Don't Mistaken My Kindness For Weakness

Do you ever walk out of a meeting and think, "Man, I really wish I would of actually said what I was feeling and thinking"? Well, that's usually me, and it usually eats away at me for days because I always keep it to myself and let it go, but not today. 

In the wonderful world of healthcare, you see a lot of people get in trouble for things they shouldn't necessarily get in trouble for, becuase of lack of training and lack of knowledge. However, you'll never see the company you're working for say you're right, shame on us. Instead, they'll just say oh well, you should of known better, here's a disciplinary write up, and now you know for future references. 

In my years of working in the healthcare field, I look back and remember where I started and where I am now. When I first started out, I was shy and quiet. I was still growing into my skin and trying to find my place in the world. I remember my first few bosses, mean as can be. They'd walk all over everyone. Didn't matter how great of a job you did, didn't matter how much value you added to the facility or the company, they looked at you as though you were replaceable and that's exactly how they treated you. 

Years later, I've come to notice this is a norm in this industry. Welcome to Corporate America, where the people are often times treated like *shit* and companies get away with it. There was a point in time where I used to keep my head low, kiss ass, bite my tongue, and not do anything about it. I'd take the write ups, I'd accept that this is how things were, and I'd let people walk all over me and treat me like I wasn't a person too. Along the way, you begin to notice the patterns and realize the cycle will never end unless you stand up for yourself and put an end to it. 

Today, was the first day I can say, I finally stood up to a manager. Normally I wouldn't pride myself on sticking it to a manager or a supervisor, but when this particular person is putting you down in front of all your fellow staff members, and telling this group of people that you didn't do your job correctly, and re-playing a scenario for the group of a particular situation gone wrong involving me and a few others, and then begins to describe to our staff that I was incompetent and didn't perform the task to the best of my ability, that's where I have a problem. Nothing makes my blood boil more than someone falsely accusing me of not doing my job correctly, when I know for a fact I did. In this situation like most, the company didn't want to acknowledge that the incident was a lack of training on their part. Instead, they justified it by saying, "Well it's just impossible to tell you everything you're supposed to know about your job. Some of these things you learn along the way." How would you feel if a manager told you that? What I'm hearing is that they can't prepare me for success, but you can sure set me up to fail. 

Let's just say my manager along with my fellow staff members will never underestimate my kindness for weakness again. When I took over the floor speaking and my manager tried to come in louder and yell over me, I raised my voice and continued speaking until I got my point across. Once I did, the end, game over. I said my peace and I wasn't going to sit there and argue with her. I showed her and our entire staff exactly what I had just said, you set us up to fail, not to succeed. One of the best parts of that conversation was when my manager threw a second excuse out there in response to the lack of training comment I made by saying, "It's because you're young, pretty, and white that you couldn't get the task done." *Que* my engines beginning to roar up again. I. was. so. mad. 

It's one thing to think you have to be a b**** to your staff to get your point across, it's another to degrade them and put them down in front of others, and it's a third to belittle them and tell someone, "It's because you're young, pretty, and white". 

Moral of the story, don't let people take your kindness for weakness, because they will, and they'll try to use you to their advantage. As the saying goes in Corporate America, "The nice guy never wins." I'm on a mission to change this. At the end of the day we're all people. We're all the same on the inside. We want people to love us, to be nice to us, to appreciate us, and to respect us. Like someone brought up on our meeting yesterday, there's a difference between making your points from a loving place versus a hateful place. Being rude and hateful towards your employees is not the only way to get the job done or your point across. Let's bring the love back into the workplace. 


  1. I agree about Corporate America! Sometimes I just can't stand it. Why can't the nice guy win? To me it doesn't make any sense. I don't see why we have to step all over others to get ahead ourselves! Just one of the things I wish the US could learn from other countries.. cut throat isn't always the best way. Thanks for sharing!! :D

  2. I couldn't believe that your manager said that! There's no reason that a coworker, let alone a manager, should ever say that to anybody! That's awesome that you stood up for yourself, and I definitely don't think that they'll mistake your kindness for weakness ever again.


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